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“I’ve been stuck for MONTHS. How do I get back on track to my fearless and empowered self?”
The expert: Rachael Evans is a world-leading visionary business pioneer, speaker, author and advisor, and is dedicated to helping women step into their bravery and reclaim their feminine power through her media empire Brave Media Network. Here's her advice.
Getting “stuck” is actually a symptom of losing sight of our goal, purpose or mission.
It's a very common phenomenon for women especially because we have so much on our plates, and we take on more than we should.
Add motherhood into the mix, and you have a recipe for serving yourself last, and putting the needs of everyone else before your own. Pile a pandemic on top of that, with the additional burdens placed disproportionately on females, and we find scores of women who were once so clear on where they were headed and what they wanted to achieve, now so overwhelmed and burnt out they are very unsure of what their next steps should be.
The key to becoming unstuck is to gain clarity once more on what you truly want. It’s not just about identifying that you want the house, or the car or the seven-figure business. It’s about tapping into your heart's desire and stripping your wanting back to its most raw form: the kind free of your own judgement or worry of what others might think.
In my Beacon of Bravery workshops, I ask the women present five layers of questions about what their heart and soul truly desires, and it’s only once we are down to the fifth layer, and have passed through judgement and the fear of resentment, that the real "wants" rise to the surface. What is uncovered may surprise you if you have never gone to that same level.
The woman who thought she wanted a jet-setting lifestyle with clients across the country actually wanted to take a year off to rest and recalibrate. In order to do that, she needed to install key leaders in her team, so her next steps forward became obvious.
The woman who thought she wanted to build a business that included her spouse realized he wasn’t going to get on board no matter what, and that she alone could build the business of her dreams. Her next step was to stop constantly seeking his approval.
And the woman who thought she had to wait until her children were finished school to bring her side hustle to life realized that she didn’t want to wait, and despite what society was telling her about good mother stereotypes, she didn’t have to wait either. There was room for both her business to thrive and for her children to be loved.
Once we refocus on what we truly want, the path forward often becomes clear again. We find our motivation, and we reconnect with our purpose.
It’s important to note here that we don’t actually need to be fear-LESS in order to feel empowered and moving towards our goals. No one is actually fearless, although movies, novels, social media and certain passages of history would have us believe otherwise. Fearlessness is a myth, because courage will never present itself and bravery will never occur, if fear isn’t present first. You actually need to feel fear!
So instead of aiming for a life absent of fear, aim to make friends with fear instead. When fear arises, know that’s a sign that you are actually moving in the right direction. Growth is meant to be a little scary and uncomfortable, and in order to take courageous leaps and giant steps forward, you need to be a little afraid of where you might land.
It’s all part of the wonderful journey that lays ahead.
Now, go and be BRAVE!
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