I Consulted an Erotic Concierge to Help Me Level-up My Sex Life

I Consulted an Erotic Concierge to Help Me Level-up My Sex Life

This content was created by Girlboss in collaboration with Arya.

I’d consider myself a pretty sexually open woman. As a fiery Scorpio-Sagittarius cusp, I’m not afraid to really go there when it comes to exploring my own pleasure—especially in my work. 

As a journalist, I’ve written about going to a Vagina Painting Party (where a group of women and I painted—fully clothed—our vaginas from memory. My anatomically incorrect painting was even published in a local newspaper. Sorry mom!), trying a Kegel trainer for the first time, and having a non-sexual cuddle session with a group of strangers. I was jokingly known as the “sex beat reporter” during my undergrad in journalism because my assignments would always come back to one common theme: destigmatizing women’s pleasure.

So, I was very curious when Arya, an erotic concierge for couples, gave me (and my sweet, patient boyfriend of 7 months) the opportunity to try out their spicy services. Arya is designed to make it radically easy for couples to deepen their emotional connection, overcome routine and have better sex. It’s like having your own virtual intimacy coach in the palm of your hands. 

Whether you and your partner are still in the exploratory stage (like we are) or have been together for years—or decades—and are looking for some “new relationship energy,” Arya curates fun date nights and erotic experiences that will have you both feeling closer than ever. Sex shouldn’t be boring, repetitive, mediocre or underwhelming, and an erotic concierge can help you break out of your sex routine. All of the fun with none of the mental load? I’m turned on already!

How does it work exactly? The first step was building my Erotic Persona. The options were: Romantic, Connector, Director or an Adventurer. I filled out their quick quiz, where I responded to statements like, “Sometimes I turn down sex because I’m overly stimulated from the day,” “I am extremely sensitive, so I can easily get turned off by a smell, taste or touch I don’t like,” and “The best sex I've experienced had less to do with trying new things and more to do with the emotional connection with my partner.”

It turns out, I’m a Romantic, which means that, for me, I need to foster emotional connection, communication, safety, self-esteem and comfortability before I have sex. Sex is just a small part of connecting with my partner. “Foreplay begins as soon as sex ends,” it said in the description. Well, that couldn’t be more accurate. Nothing gets me going more than emotional intimacy!

This is where the fun really began. I filled out another questionnaire to tell Arya what desires and curiosities I wanted to explore with my boyfriend. Then, it was time for me to unlock our first Scene, Arya’s curated, multisensory erotic adventure. Ours was called “Crave.” “Experience delayed orgasms through an exploration of power exchange and sexual edging.” I was intrigued. As an instant-gratification girlie who hates waiting, I knew edging would be hard, but I’ve never been one to back out of a challenge.

Each Scene has multiple chapters, so you want to make sure you space it out over a few nights (this makes the build-up that much more intense). There’s videos, articles, activities and step-by-step guidance for your path to pleasure. There were 10 for ours, including a playlist, aftercare instructions, an article on vulva pleasure, and different scenarios for edging and power play, where the man is meant to take the lead and the woman is meant to take the lead.

A few days later, a box of sexy goodies arrived at my door: a vibrator, a leather blindfold and CBD suppositories which are meant to enhance penetration, ease discomfort and increase relaxation.

I also opted in to getting text messages from the Arya concierge, which I would highly recommend because it really leveled-up the whole experience for me. Getting a text from an unknown number with links to erotic content in the middle of the workday? So. damn. hot.

Now it was time for the main event. I was giddy with anticipation!

I thought I liked to be in charge, but I might be a certified pillow princess after having fun with the blindfold. It was refreshing to give up control for once! Every sensation felt so much stronger, and I felt like I could truly relax and let go because I didn’t have my sight. It was some of the most fun sex I’ve ever had with a partner, and I can’t wait to unlock our next Scene.

I don’t know how I’ve gone this long without having my own erotic concierge. And you shouldn’t either.

Want to deepen your emotional connection with your partner and add a little bit of spice to your sex life in the process? Get 15% off of your first Arya purchase with the code PLAY15.